Finding Your Rhythm In Wellness
Wellness is overwhelming these days with too much info and too little time to digest it in our fast paced "fix-it", "to-do" list culture.
My approach to wellness comes from 16 years of experience in applying wellness practices to my everyday life in way that I have been able to sustain and grow over time. Taking a slow and steady path, leaving myself time to find my rhythm in wellness. This also meant learning how to bring myself back to balance and what balanced looked like for me. To discern my needs with confidence took time. I not only had to learn the needs of my body, but my mind and spirit too. Most importantly, I built a network of support and filled my toolbox with things and people that help me maintain my overall wellbeing. Mind, body, spirit. Overtime, I learned to call upon who and what I needed when I was unable to support or remedy the issue myself.
While the end goal is to get to a place where you can come back to balance on your own (for the most part), in the meantime, you have to gain the knowledge and experience to do so.
That’s where the experts come in.
That’s where the work comes in.
Growth happens when education and application meet and provide a shift. When a person is willing to make the changes, to be with the discomfort of transformation.
My goal, to bridge the gap between the wellness industry and the consumer/end user and help people stop consuming wellness and start utilizing wellness in positive ways that alleviate stress rather than add to it. To ultimately help others own their path in wellness.
There are some really powerful tools and services that can change your life, but you have to be willing to learn them, not just receive them. To truly understand what it is you are doing, receiving, or using. When you don’t take the time to learn about the service or the tool you’re using, you leave half of the power of said tool on the table.
The other half of the power lies within you. You are the other half of that power, responsible for activating and synthesizing the tools you acquire on your wellness way. Only you know what tools work best for you and your unique life and needs. Application and synthesis take time which is why it’s imperative you take an active role in your wellness, in your life, and have patience. Slow and steady. Pulsing in moments of action and a little push when needed.
When following this approach, the gimmicks start to fade and your confidence rises along with the ability to discern and make wellness choices that actually work for you. Educating yourself through experience, support from others, and self study, with participation being mandatory.
Your participation is the key you’ve been searching for, the key that will unlock your wellness path.
Team work
Wellness is a relationship and all relationships are a give and take, a two way street. When you can see wellness as a relationship between your mind, body, and spirit - not something that you need to do to, something to be added to your checklist of things to “get done, you will begin to see results.
Focus on what matters - tending to the relationship between mind, body, and soul and keeping that relationship in balance and in harmony. When you can make this connection I promise your viewpoint of health and wellness, your body, and your life, will change. Rather than adding more stress to your life, it takes it away. Wellness should feel good on your body, mind, and spirit. If it doesn’t, it’s time to reevaluate your relationship with that tool, service, or provider.
Some fundamentals of wellness:
1. Let go of getting wellness done
It’s not a checklist of chores. It a practice. It’s your life. No need to rush through or try to finish or be complete - savor it, enjoy it, take an active role in it, be a part of it. Know that it’s ongoing, a process, and be ok with the fact that it doesn’t “end”. It’s not about the ending or about getting it done or even about someone fixing you - it’s about what happens along the way. Focusing on the “end” or “being done'“ is a waste of your energy and resources. Let it go and enjoy the ride and save those precious resources for something else.
2. Use your time wisely
Rather than thinking of when you’re going to be done, be “healed”, or be fixed, know that we are ever changing beings that require different things at different times. Healing is ongoing. You need to discern what works and what doesn’t - things and people that you feel supported by and things and people you don’t feel supported by. If you don’t pay attention and take an active role, you’ll just keep looping into dead ends, finding you relate to those that think “I’ve tried everything, nothing works”.
Really pay attention to what actually works for you so that you can take what you need and leave the rest and really make it your own. Make room for new things and let go of things that you no longer need, don’t hoard wellness, or anything, for that matter.
Move into the places and spaces that bring you joy, comfort, ease, safety, grace, empowerment, and love. Things and people that make you feel better than you did before. If you focus on that you won’t miss the signals and signs of when something isn’t working for you - and trust me, not everything/everyone is going to be for you. But if you pay attention, trust your gut and intuition, you won’t waste your time, money, or stamina on things, people, or services you don’t need avoiding a “wellness burnout”.
Wellness is for the long haul, avoid burnout and going broke by understanding what you need and what you don’t. Avoid blind consumption and time spent waiting for “it to work” - spoiler alert, “it” won’t work if you don’t participate.
3. Address your victim
If you’re still pointing a finger outward - whether it be to the western medical system, the eastern system, or anything in between, then you haven’t quite gotten the message - you’re missing the point. The external blame game is a way to deflect you from your own involvement and ownership in your wellness. Nobody can make you do anything, there is always a choice that can be made, or a compromise at the very least. You are the boss of your body, period. If you don’t like something, change it. If something doesn’t work for you, stop doing it. And it’s not always that simple so if you need support, ask for it. Help is always just an ask away. Overtime, this whole process becomes easier.
And in saying this I don’t mean to sound harsh, but it is the truth. Your attitude and perceived power are so important. If you’re going around saying “nothing works” feeling frustrated, then more than likely, nothing will work. Or at least you’ll believe that to be true.
But things do work. You can feel better, but it’s up to you to make that happen. You need to believe that in your bones. And I know it’s hard to take responsibility, but in the case of auto-immune, it can be a matter of defying your disease or succumbing to it. Again, the choice is yours, but I highly recommend you make the hard choice and take ownership in your lifestyle. It will create so much more ease in the end.
4. Slow and steady wins the race
Take your time and make changes that you can sustain and build upon. There is no use in adding wellness habits onto your plate if you can’t handle your current plate. Just like with food, sometimes are wellness eyes are bigger than our wellness bellies - you bite off more than you can chew and we all know this never ends well.
Pick one area, let’s say movement, and start with one change that is realistic. If you are not currently doing any type of exercise or movement, please don’t go zero to 60 and add 5 days to the goal sheet that include cardio and a mix of classes. I’d suggest starting with a 20 minute walk, three times a week. Once you master that habit, add on another. What does master mean? It means that you have been consistently doing something for at least 3 months. If you’d rather add a group class, great! Pick 2 times a week that work for you and book them in advance for the month. Again, after 3 months of consistently showing up, add another day or something new.
Wellness isn’t going anywhere. Take your time to enjoy, assimilate, and actually learn the techniques that supporting your wellbeing. I know that it can be tempting to have the want to do “all the things”, but refrain. Trust me. Take your time. It will serve you so much more if you can find a little patience.
5. Build a network
I can’t emphasize enough the importance of having a supportive network. A network is a group of people that help you navigate your illness so that you don’t have to do it alone. What does that look like? It can vary from person to person, but in general, this would be a great foundation to build upon:
Trusted friend or family member
A licensed professional for mental health needs
Naturopathic Doctor or General Practitioner with a functional and holistic approach
1-1 Wellness Coach and/or Functional Nutritionist - Someone you consult for nutrition advice specific to your needs.
It’s ok to follow a few people for inspo, ideas, and some tips, on social (but like 3 max, less is more here), but you really want an actual person that you can talk to, build a relationship with, and that knows you. Someone you can have a dialogue with.
Your practitioner should also be able to point you in the direction of other practitioners that you might want to try. They should be someone that you trust and feel comfortable with taking recommendations from. They should alleviate the searching for you and help you find what you are looking for, it should be part of their service.
1-1 Strength and flexibility teacher/coach. That can be a yoga teacher, a trainer, a physical therapist, a Pilates teacher, etc. Just someone that you can go to for personal, 1-1 care and sessions.
Group classes are great as well, but you want to compliment them with 1-1 sessions where you can fine tune your movement and focus on your specific needs. This will greatly complement your other activities! You don’t have to go weekly, maybe it’s something you treat yourself to once a month or a few times a year. Any time 1-1 is impactful.
Spiritual support. Whatever that looks like to you, but your spirit and soul, your nervous system and subtle body, also need tending to. Meditation is a great way to start tapping into your inner world alongside breath-work if you aren’t sure where to start.
I know that being well can seem like a daunting task that breeds feelings of failure, overwhelm, and defeat. I’ve been there and still go there at times. It’s OK. It’s OK to “fail”, to live and learn, to be confused, to question, to feel like quitting, even. But rather than succumb to feelings and emotions that are simply there to guide you along your way, use them. Utilize those feelings and emotions to pivot, to change course, to reflect and review, and most importantly, to try again. Tomorrow is always another day.
Eventually, you will find your unique rhythm.
I offer 1-1 coaching sessions if you need support on your path. To schedule a free 15 minute call email vas@eso-livewell.com.
Such great suggestions here!